My youngest daughter Bonnie graduated from high school two weeks ago Saturday. Relatives came from near and far to attend the graduation ceremonies and to help us celebrate the occasion. It was a wonderful time. The house was full and some of the attendees hadn't seen each other in years.

Graduation was at 4:00 pm and reservations for dinner were at 7:00 pm at Bonnie's favorite restaurant. Even though I tried to make it easy, just the effort of leaving for the restaurant was an event in itself - the pleas for everyone to quit talking and get ready, the crush of six women primping in one bathroom, the decision of who was riding with whom, the search for lost car keys, the last-minute instructions for the babysitter, the cars jockeying out of the driveway, the last-last-minute-change-of-purse trip, and the last-last-last-minute trip back inside to put the dog out. I was uncharacteristically cool and collected. No impatient outburst was heard. Job would have been proud!

We arrived on time and followed the hostess single file to the "party room" in the back of the noisy restaurant. Fortunately, our room was quiet and beautiful. We made our drink orders, and upon receiving them, made toast after toast to Bonnie, her graduation, to departed loved ones, to each other, and to life.

Because this was the last event of the weekend for which I was responsible, I breathed an audible sigh of relief and was able to relax and enjoy myself. It was at that time that I remembered what Don Lewis had once told me. He said to take photos of a special event in your head, pictures of all the things that were going on around you so that later you could readily reproduce the image in your mind. So I looked at all the people sitting around the table, taking pictures in my mind. I noted the way my Mother tilted her head while delivering a punch line, the similar hand mannerisms of my daughters, my brother-in-law's laugh, my sister-in-law's enthusiasm for old stories, the way my sister and brother-in-law held hands while looking over the menu. Clearly and instantly, a thought entered my head - I love these people! These are people I truly love unconditionally.

The Bible says, "Let love be your greatest aim." It's not enough to say, "One of the things I want in life is to be more loving," as if it's in your top ten list. Relationships must have priority in your life above everything else. Because life without love is really worthless. The Apostle Paul makes this point: "No matter what I say, what I believe and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love."

Why is it that we often act as if relationships are something to be squeezed into our schedule? We talk about finding time for our children or making time for people in our lives. That gives the impression that relationships are just a part of our lives along with many other tasks. But God says relationships are what life is all about. Four of the Ten Commandments deal with our relationship to God while the other six deal with our relationships with people. But all ten are about relationships!

In The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren says, "Relationships, not achievements or the acquisition of things, are what matters most in life. So why do we allow our relationships to get the short end of the stick? When our schedules become overloaded, we start skimming relationships, cutting back on giving the time, energy, and attention that loving relationships require. What's most important to God is displaced by what, in our mind is urgent. Busyness is a great enemy of relationships. We become preoccupied with making a living, doing our work, paying bills, and accomplishing goals as if these tasks are the point of life. They are not. The point of life is learning to love - God and people. A life minus love equals zero in God's book."

Reflect on the past couple of days-where has your time has gone, what would someone looking at your life from the outside say is the most important thing to you? Who in your life right now could use some special attention from you? At the end of your life, what do you hope people will say about you?

Gracious Lord,when all is said and done,
and above all,may our lives be lives that reflect Your love.
Help us to be patient with ourselves for we have
an unending reserve of self-orientation.
Give us a vision for our lives that keeps us persevering in our ability
to love others as You would have us.
Amen.

Jan Cook
Communications